The Manor House Castle Coombe

I had been invited to play two rounds with a friend, as part of a wider stay at The Manor House Hotel with the Lotus Emira. The hotel and car had already done their bit: one providing Cotswold charm and deeply civilised hospitality, the other providing mid-engined theatre and a colour scheme that could be seen from Chippenham. Now it was the turn of the golf course.

A large SUV appears entirely at home pulling up to a grand historic building, as though it has merely returned from a light bout of pheasant disturbance. A discreet German saloon also looks suitable, particularly if it is muted in colour, electric-silent and wafting across the pea shingle.

But a bright purple Lotus? This is not discreet. It does not sidle quietly into an open forecourt and hope not to be noticed. It arrives with the visual and audible subtlety of a quality-street wrapper at a funeral.